With a Sixsome Just Minutes After Stepping Into the Resort, BFF Lived Up to Its Name
My first night was indeed a "Bisexual F*ck Fest."
Original illustration by Tara Savelo
My brother and I were devouring buttery Cuban food on Ventura Boulevard when I casually shared I was attending a lifestyle party in Palm Springs called BFF. He asked me what the acronym stood for, and I stared back at him.
“You can figure this out,” I replied.
“Bisexual…um…fuck… fest?”
“Yup,” I replied.
“Really?” he said in disbelief. When I confirmed, you’d have thought he had just won the Mega Millions lottery. He was elated to have guessed correctly—giddy, even.
While I was trying to play it cool, acting like this swinger party wasn’t a big deal (I’m not sure whose benefit this was for), truthfully, I was also giddy. Less than three months earlier, I had attended the bisexual takeover at Hedonism II in Jamacia and really felt I had found my people there.
I love bisexual swingers (where BOTH the men and women in the couple are bi, not just the women). Dare I say, I’m finding myself gravitating towards them more than many of the people in my queer, poly spaces in New York. I can go on a passionate rant about why, but I will spare you the theratics. Here’s what I will say: Bisexual lifestyle people are fucking chill.
While reductive, here’s my hypothesis as to why: One, the swingers I have been hanging out with are a little bit older (in their fifties, sixties, and seventies) and very secure in their relationships, as in many cases, they’ve been married for decades. With age, you also get better at communicating, navigating jealousy, feeling more secure, setting boundaries, and all that stuff we struggle with in our twenties and thirties.
Two, lifestyle people just want to have fun. They don’t overcomplicate things. They have kids at home. CHILDREN. Additionally, many of the bi men are new to being big ol’ power bottoms and taking dick, and they only have another ten years where they can arch their back without joint pain, so they are taking advantage now.
These full-on adults with adult lives and adult jobs and adult families only have a couple of weeks a year where they get to let their hair down and fuck, so they’re not creating any drama. They’re not in their own asses overintellectualizing their relationship structure. They’re just being positive, kind, and fucking the folks they want to fuck.
How lovely does this sound?
You now understand why I was stoked about this trip. I had also gone through a particularly rough December between my mental and physical health—I am better now—but I craved a carefree, pleasurable paradise in the desert where I could fuck some MILFs, DILFs, and GILFs. I was ready psychologically. (And with my Viagra and bottle of Immodium in my leather pack, I was also ready physically.)
I attended BFF with my partner Eve, a full-time professional domantrix and all-around smoke show. A little bit about Eve: Her big brown eyes are iridescent, made more pronounced by her dangerously sharp winged eyeliner. Her lips curl up mischievously, so it always seems like she’s thinking of erotic ways to hurt you. (Fun fact: She is always thinking of erotic ways to hurt you.)
While her tits and ass are glorious—so meaty and juicy and fuckable—it’s her aura that is irresistible: a quiet, magnetic confidence that makes you willing to die for her (as many of her clients have stated they would).
And did I mention that she’s hornier than me? Just ready and wanting to fuck 24/7? I haven’t ever dated someone with a higher libido than myself—I didn’t think that was possible—but let me tell you, it’s fabulous. Well, my friends are the ones who reap the benefits because I end up tuckered out and calling in for reinforcements. (“Again? Okay, let me see what Amelia and Omar are up to tonight.”)
So I couldn’t think of anyone better to invite than Eve.
On Thursday night, the event's first evening, we drove to Erotic Dreams Resort, where BFF took place. (We received tickets to BFF too late and had to book an AirBnB off-site). The resort exterior was a little shabby. I wouldn’t go as far as to call it dilapidated, but it was overdue for a renovation. But it gave the resort character like it had seen some shit over the years (which I’m sure it had).
It was later in the evening, after check-in, so Eve and I used the after-hours code on the side of the hotel to enter. We stepped inside and were quickly greeted by Charlene. She and her partner Ben had initially told me about BFF while I was at Hedo. In fact, they were the ones who invited me, put me in touch with BFF’s producer, and convinced me to attend (not that I needed much convincing).
“Zachhhh,” she shouted. She held her arms wide, and one of her breasts popped out from under her robe.
“Charlene!” I replied, giving her a big ol’ bear hug. “This is my partner, Eve.” Charlene wrapped her arms around Eve as if they’d known each other for years.
Looking her up and down, Charlene said, “My god, you are gorgeous.”
“Thank you,” Eve replied demurely.
“RIGHT, SHE IS SO FUCKING HOT,” I screamed, my voice characteristically chill.
Charlene led us to her room and opened the door, revealing Ben (also a bisexual Jew from the valley) standing on the bed, getting his dick sucked by a curvy woman as she bounced onto a long-haired fellow’s cock in cowgirl.
“Hi, Zach,” Ben said, thrusting his cock into the woman’s mouth.
“Hello,” I replied before introducing the room to Eve.
“This is Barbara,” Ben said, gesturing to the woman deepthroating him. Barbara gargled, “Hermmooo.”
The long-haired fellow peaked out behind Barbara, revealing his face. “And I’m Sean.”
“Hi, Sean!” Eve and I replied in unison, as if we were at an AA meeting (but we were so not at an AA meeting).
As soon as the salutations finished, Barbara’s moans rapidly escalated. She took Ben’s dick out of her mouth, stood directly above Sean’s stomach, and wailed, “I am going to do it! I am going to do it!”
“Squirt, baby!” Sean eagerly replied. Then I heard a loud, shrill voice that reminded me of a scenario involving the hawk that circles my apartment. The hawk protects the complex (and nearby park), and while I appreciate her service, periodically, I will hear the death cries of a pigeon she is mutilating with her talons. It’s horrifying, and you never habituate to the ungodly screams.
Barbara sounded like one of those pigeons.
I grabbed Eve’s hand, hoping it would prevent my fight-or-flight syndrome from kicking in, but it was too late. Blood was pumping through my veins, and I could have easily benchpressed a truck.
Barbara then let it out. To say it was like a waterfall cascading down doesn’t do her squirting justice. Perhaps a tsunami? If she were standing over Sean’s face, it would have quickly become a waterboarding situation, so I’m glad she was only squirting over his stomach and cock.
Between the sounds and visuals, I was in awe. My jaw had sunk past the floor and was in hell with all the pigeons the Prospect Park Hawk had torn to shreds.
I gulped. “Holy mother of God.” I turned to Eve, who, like me, had seen a lot of shit, and who, like me, was mesmerized.
Barbara got off Sean, grabbed her water gallon, and began chugging.
Sean asked if we wanted to join. I asked Barbara, “Are you ready to go again?”
“Oh, yeah, absolutely,” she replied as if she hadn’t just projectiled enough water to supply a desert village for a week.
I then asked Eve, “Should we… join?”
“Isn’t that why we’re here?” Eve replied. She had a point.
And so, we stripped down to our birthday suits and found a sliver of the mattress to claim. Eve, on her knees on the corner of the bed, started sucking my cock, while I watched as Charlene bent over the side of the bed sucking Sean’s cock. Ben was plowing Charlene from behind. (So Charlene was getting spit-roasted.)
Barbara draped her full mommy milkers over Sean’s mouth, and he suckled like a good boy while Charlene continued choking on his cock.
(You guys, it is really hard to write a sixsome, especially without describing everyone in ridiculous detail, but I didn’t want this to be 5,000 words. I AM DOING MY BEST, OKAY?)
I ran my hands through Eve’s long hair until I reached her scalp and gave a little tug before pushing her down further on my cock. She looked up at me and then repositioned herself to take in what was happening next to us.
Barbara straddled Sean’s face, his tongue fucking her pussy. Her clit on his bearded lip. Sean spread her cheeks to get his sloppy tongue even deeper inside her cunt. His face, or what I could see of it, was turning red—the man couldn’t breathe and was living. (Perhaps dying is more accurate.)
“I’m going to squirt again!” Barbara shouted. She mightily rose off her throne like the queen she was, and squirt poured out of her. Impressively, Sean continued to throat fuck Charlene while Ben, still deep inside Charlene’s pussy, shouted, “YESSS!”
The four of them were a well-oiled machine. I wasn’t sure exactly how Eve and I would insert ourselves into the scene.
But then, Barabara got up to grab her water jug, and Sean hopped off the bed to grab a towel. Charlene moved to straddle my dick, and Ben started fucking Eve in doggy style next to us. (The fluidity of movement! How effortlessly they glided between positions.)
Charlene looked possessed as she rode me—not evil possessed—just not in control of her body. Her irises rolled to the back of her head as drool dripped down her lips onto her perky tits. When she rode me, her pelvis lurched back and forth, and I’d feel my dick hit her G-spot, her spongey insides.
I grabbed her hips to thrust deeper into her. She tilted her head back, and all I saw in front of me was the body of a goddess, succumbing to her own pleasure.
Meanwhile, Eve’s cheeks were clapping on Ben’s cock—smackidy, smackidy, smack. Each smack reverberated throughout the room, and Ben was having a goddamn field day, his massive smile far too big for his tiny face. Eve’s ass tends to do that to men (and women and nonbinary babes).
Hydrated and washed, Barbara and Sean returned to the bed. Eve began riding my face while Charlene continued riding my cock. Barbara was double-fisting dicks, switching her wet mouth back and forth until she opened wide and took in both simultaneously.
I grabbed Eve’s ass and pushed her full, 70s bush into my mouth. I thrusted deeper into Charlene’s pussy as I slurped up Eve’s juices. My air supply was low, and I went to push Eve off.
“Not yet,” she said, giggling. “You don’t need to breathe now, do you?” I kept licking her pussy with my tongue until, when she felt I deserved it, she rose and bequeathed me oxygen.
Eve was now beside me on her knees, and I could see three women and two men hovering over me. My lovers all appeared as giants, and I was like a grasshopper. (If you get this reference, please DM me.) At 6’4, I rarely get to feel small—to feel like people have the physical ability to overtake me. And in that moment, all I wanted was for them to hold me down and have their way with me.
Instead, Sean and Ben waggled their penises next to my face like bait. Being a Wild Alaskan King Salmon, I swallowed them up whole. I’d deepthroat Ben’s, get myself to gag to make it nice and wet, and then jerk Ben off while I sucked off Sean. Both of them could immediately sense my cock goblin vibes, and so they went to town on my throat, just the way I liked. Ben ran his fingers through my hair before pushing me down on Sean. I gagged, and Ben said, “Good, just like that.”
“Do you think you can handle two dicks at once?” Sean asked. I nodded. Of course I fucking could—was that a joke?
The two men scooted closer. I unhinged my jaw, and they both fit. I wrapped my hand around each of their asses and fingered both their holes while sucking on their dicks.
Charlene, who was still riding me with her face just inches from mine sucking cock, said, “Fuck, that’s hot.”
Eve would have admired it, but her face was buried in Barbara’s pussy. She wanted that squirt, and by God, she would get it.
Barbara opened her mouth and let out her Black Canary cry, ultrasonic vibrations that could rupture eardrums and tear down steel walls. We all had to stop and stare as she Splash Mountained all over Eve’s rosy-red lips and winged eyes. The water ricocheted off Eve’s face and hit the rest of us, who were unknowingly in the splash zone.
Everyone in the room was either laughing or marveling. Once we all had tinnitus, Barbara simmered down. We lay on the bed together, taking a collective breather.
Within a minute, Ben asked, “Round two?” Charlene, Sean, and Barbara all nodded.
How?
I was dead, my body was sore, and I desperately needed a break. Eve at least claimed to need a break to support me, though I suspect she would have participated in round two if I weren't there.
“You guys are insatiable animals,” I said. They took my compliment with pride. “I think I’d like to get a lay of the land,” I continued. Eve and I hadn’t stepped more than two dozen feet into the resort before having this sixsome, all within the first hour of the first evening. There were four nights total, so I had to pace myself.
For what it’s worth, I didn’t. I sprinted my way through the entire marathon. And this orgy undoubtedly set the tone for what and who was to cum.
Upcoming Bisexual Swinger Events:
BFF: If you’re interested in attending future BFF events—they happen twice a year, once in the summer and once in the winter—you’ll have to speak to BFF’s producer, Brad. BFF is a very close-knit community, and they’re very cautious about letting new folks in for both safety and vibe purposes. The way to reach Brad is to make an account on Kasidie and message him. His handle is CUTEONES. (FYI, you get a free one-month trial on Kasidie by listing CUTEONES as your referral when you sign up.)
BI OUT (Las Vegas May 2-5): I will be attending Bi OUT in Las Vegas. This is another bisexual swingers event, and I am VERY much looking forward to it. (I’ll actually be giving an anal play workshop that ends with attendees putting toys and their cocks inside of me! Get tickets here!)
As a 5 year veteran BFFer, your luscious descriptions are gleefully accurate to the reality of the events. We have found our people, too, and don’t want to ever lose them. We are in LA, reach out on Kasidie.
Aren’t you glad you came? 😈🍸