This COVID Vaccine Got Me Horny for the Future
BOYSLUT ISSUE 28: I plan on throwing a Motorbunny exhibitionist sex party when COVID is finally “over.”
So, a lot of you messaged me wanting to be a red hood. I had a feeling most of my readers were bottoms, but this confirms it. Just know, the moment I get that mRNA vaccine, I will be handing out loads like candy. I imagine like when you’re waiting in line at the deli. Get a ticket, queue up, and bend over. ORDER UP!
Or maybe not…
I was talking to my brother last night. He is one of those guys who knows a lot about most things. I think it’s a product of living in Silicon Valley. I think you somehow get information sooner than the rest of the world, especially when it revolves around tech or medicine.
He’s convinced that the vaccine isn’t going to be as effective as we think it’s going to be, and folks will still get COVID. And the thing is, say it is 90% effective. That doesn’t sound bad, right? But the issue is, if we all stop social distancing since we don’t think we’re going to get it, we’re exposing ourselves to more opportunities to get the virus. So while cases will go down in general, folks will still be getting this fucking virus. It never fucking ends.
FYI, this is my hypothesis, and it’s not substantiated by any facts. I didn’t speak to any doctors or anything. But at this point, let’s be real, we’re all fucking hypothesizing. One thing that’s been made clear throughout this pandemic: We really don’t know shit.
I was just hoping that we could have one month of summer in 2021. I was praying by August, shit would return to reality, but now I’m not so sure.
But God, it’s tough not to get a case of the “fuck its.” I’ve had numerous careful friends and family members still get this goddamn virus—especially in this past month/most recent spike. While I haven’t been going completely balls to the walls, I am less cautious than they are. But knowing that the folks who were so fucking careful are still getting it makes me want to scream, “SCREW IT, LET’S FUCK UNTIL MY DICK FALLS OFF.”
Alas, I don’t. I know you can’t have that mentality, and you still have to remain safe. Nevertheless, I’m all about harm reduction. I understand that folks can’t be completely socially-isolated for the sake of their mental health, so do what you need to do, but do it as safely and honestly as you can.
All I know is when COVID is “done,” whenever that may be, I plan on finally having the Motorbunny party I was planning in early March. (LOL at all our ambitions, plans, and dreams.) I was gonna have 15 folks of all genders and sexual orientations over, and we all take turns riding the Motorbunny while the rest of us watch.
I don’t want this to turn into a full-on sex party. I want this to be more about exhibitionism and voyeurism. With the Motorbunny, you get fucked like you never have before. The vibrations are powerful. I think it’s incredibly intimate to be seen while you’re cuming your hardest. I also think it’s fucking hot to watch others get fucked in a way they never have before. You see their eyes widen, and that thought ping: “Oh shit, this...this is better than I thought it’d be.”
(HEY MOTORBUNNY, PLEASE LET ME BE YOUR BRAND AMBASSADOR AND GIVE ME MONEY!)
Alright, onto the next issue: paywalls.
I know it’s fucking annoying, but there are two issues. The first is that there’s a decent chance I’m going to get kicked off Instagram due to the new rules regarding “objectionable content.” Violations now include “suggestive elements,” which include “regional sexualized slang” (like the title of this newsletter), “contextually specific or commonly sexual emojis,” along with sexual solicitation (and I’m always trying to have sex with all of you). You may or may not know, but I make about half of my income via Instagram, so shit.
The second issue is that I have to prioritize the work I get paid for. When I write this type of newsletter, it takes about three hours from start to finish. When I write an erotic, personal sex story, like the one with Wolf and Daya or the Dutch sex party where I fucked 10 dudes in hoods, it takes me an entire day. On a week like this, where I have three features and a 7-minute video due, I don’t have the time to write about the first time I sucked a dick after winning a bet or the time I thought I was seducing a cougar, but it turned out she was seducing me. (The old switcheroo!) If we want more of that content, I have to put a paywall up to turn down these other gigs (which I’d love to do).
I’m thinking a modest $4.99 a month. You’ll get a guarantee of two raunchy, real, first-person sex stories. Some months, three. Sound off in the comments, or DM me if you’re interested! I need at least 150 subscribers to make this worth it.
Alright, some fun articles came out in the past two weeks! The first is on what “commitment” means when you’re poly! Commitment is often synonymous with monogamous, so how does it differ (and remain the same) when you’re in a relationship with multiple people?
I'm in a Loving, Committed Relationship. I'm Also Polyamorous.
Then a ton of you responded to my request on why you love to peg men! I couldn’t include everyone’s replies, but the takeaway is that women love shoving silicone dicks up guys’ asses. (Sometimes, I worry about the future, and then I read all your responses and know the kids will be alright.)
14 Women Reveal Why Pegging Men Turns Them on
Last but not least, this week’s Sexplain It. A man who’d been married to his wife had a “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” policy, and it fucking exploded when he “accidentally” read her texts and saw she’d been fucking this dude with a meaty horse cock for over a year. While I wanted to, I did not suggest that he turn bi and date him too. That’s because I am a ~ProFesSionAL.~
Sexplain It: I Found Out My Wife Has a Hot Side Piece and I’m Jealous AF
That’s all for now!
Xoxox,
Your Thirsty Boyslut,
Zachary Zane
I’ll gladly pay. It’s a small price to pay for all of the feels you provide.
I would pay.